The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships (Paperback)

The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships Cover Image
Usually Ships in 1-5 Days


When The Dance of Deceptionwas published, Lerner discovered that women were not eager to identify with the subject. -Well, I don't do deception- was a common resonse.

We all -do deception-, often with the intention to protect ourselves and the relationships we depend on. The Dance of Deceptionunravels the ways (and whys) that women show the false and hide the real -- even to our own selves. We see how relationships are affected by lying and faking, by silence and pretending and by brave -- but misguided -- efforts to tell the truth.

Truth-telling is at the heart of what is most central in women's lives. It is at the foundation of authenticity and creativity, intimacy and joy. Yet in the name of -honesty-, we can bludgeon each other. We can approach a difficult issue with such a poor sense of timing and tact that we can actually shut down the lines of communication rather than widening the path of truth-telling.

Sometimes Lerner's advice takes a surprising turn -- for example, when she asks us to engage in a bold act of pretending in order to discover something -more real-; or when she tells us not to parachute down on our family to bring up a -hot issue- without laying the necessary groundwork first.

Whether the subject is affairs, family secrets, sexual faking or the challenge of -being oneself-, Lerner helps us to discover, speak and live our own truths.

Praise For…

“Stunning in it’s impact. This is a book to be read and reread.”
-Betty Carter, M.S.W. Director Emerita, Family Institute of Westchester, New York.

“A remarkable, beautifully written book illuminating ways for women to find integrity, courage, and voice in a world that rewards female silence and pretense.”
-Carol Tavris, Ph.D.

Product Details
ISBN: 9780060924638
ISBN-10: 0060924632
Publisher: William Morrow & Company
Publication Date: March 28th, 1997
Pages: 272
Language: English